Co-dependent behaviour is very common when you have or have led a traumatic life. You end up getting dependent on people beyond what is appropriate. This happens simply because you are on uncertain ground and a person who you perceive to be ‘up there’ becomes like an emotional or intellectual crutch. It’s ok to be like this for a while. But not good in the long run simply because any form of addiction or excessive dependency on something is bad.
The only way to get out of this is to start building all the traits that you feel that person has, in yourself. When you start excelling in certain areas, you will find that your level of dependency on that person has taken a massive hit. You then start looking at that person as a person and not as a saviour – a flesh-and-blood human being who is flawed, just like yourself. And that is a good place to be.
Keep doing better for yourself. Keep fighting for a better version of yourself. Step outside yourself and do things for yourself, that you would do for people who you love. Small steps.